I don't know any coach who doesn't go for two in the latter scenario. They all start playing the percentages that late in the game. As to the 4th and 2 from the 41... I am a believer that there is no definitive right and wrong. You have to make a decision based on the game situation and what you know about your team. Marrone got hammered a lot on here for punting on 4th down but normally he made the right call. He had an insipid offense and a defense that was very very good. Teams rarely went 80 yards and scored on them. In those situations sometimee you have to accept that as much as you want to be aggressive you team isn't built to win that way.
'Game situation' is very important, but also it's about, imho, which team has 'momentum', and how much that will change, depending on the success, or not, of 'going for it'.
Having said that, iirc, McDermott said in one of his pressers, that he intends to be aggressive in those types of situations, although I believe he was referring more to the traditional '4th and 1' scenario, but even so, that should make him more likely to 'go for it' on a 4th and 2 from around the 40.
Personally, I'm hoping he does pay as much attention to the first point I made, as possible, as getting those decisions right more often than not, is something that definitely helps you win games.